Have I ever told you how much PCS prep sucks?!

Don’t get me wrong, I am looking forward to this move immensely, although right at this exact moment, I can’t differentiate between my desire to move and my desire to have this move over with.

My outlook calendar is bursting with color, my to do lists are never-ending and my energy level is dwindling. Bad combination. I am so very thankful Bryan made it home on the 8th instead of today, as originally expected because I don’t know how I would have gotten it all done without him and not taken someones head off in the process.

Thanks to a TMO (traffic management office for those non-mil types) screw up (who’s surprised…not me), we move to TLF (military temporary living facilities) Monday. Movers come Tuesday and Thursday. Yes, that’s not a typo, Tuesday and Thursday. My house will sit full of boxes and unlivable for a day because somehow Wednesday just totally fell off the radar even though back on June 8th we were booked for July 20th, 21st and 22nd. Only in the military can a day just vanish off the calendar. But…well…yeah, let’s not go there. We hand over the keys to the house on Friday and hit the road to Las Vegas on Sunday.

At this point, Sunday can not get here soon enough. Only 8 days 1 hour 43 minutes until we are on our new journey.

Anyhow, it is now 0551 and I have to be up at 0645, so I suppose I ought to go attempt to lay back down. Bryan and Jacey are headed to the Gulfarium with a friend while I get my last cut and color (I am going to really miss Wendy), then we are all meeting for lunch. Once we get back home, it is back to the to do lists…sigh.

No rest for the weary, uh wicked. Eh!?

:)

Sigh.

I really do not know what is wrong with me. Sure, I have always liked ice cream, but here lately the like has turned into a full out addiction. Is it boredom? Is it mild depression? Is it stress? I dunno but it has to go. Somehow, someway.

But man, sugar withdrawals are killer. I’ll get through a few days until I can no longer handle the pounding headache, give in and eat ice cream. Headache goes away but then I am miffed at myself for giving in and not being “in control”. If this is how drug addicts feel, I can understand why quitting is so hard. And, we won’t even mention what it is doing to my hips. I am petrified to go to my doctors appointment on Monday. He’s never made a single comment about any gains I have had here or there, but I feel like I am not only letting myself down but him as well.

Do they make ice cream addicts anonymous? Ice cream rehab?

I am starting the one hundred push ups and two hundred sit ups challenge. I have finally decided that I AM going to be able to keep up with Bryan’s pt requirements for the military and while I have no issues with the run, I cannot do push ups or sit ups to save my life.My endurance is strong, but my core strength sucks. I can do plank into upward facing dog in yoga but can’t come back up on a push up. Pitiful really ;).

So, today I did the initial test. 4 sit ups and 3 push ups. Those numbers are so bad, I shouldn’t even admit to them but alas, I am not going to improve by hiding behind my weaknesses. I plan to do the actual program on M-W-F, starting Monday. I even downloaded the iPhone apps for both programs, so I have an easy way to track that is always with me no matter where I am (since I won’t finish the program before we move). As I get going, I will post my progresses sporadically to keep myself accountable. Help me out there too though…okay?!

Always, do it anyway!

_________________

The only way to be happy and successful; Do it Anyway

People are often unreasonable, irrational and self-centered;
Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies;
Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and sincere, people may deceive you;
Be honest and sincere anyway.
What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight;
Create anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous;
Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, will often be forgotten;
Do good anyway.
Give the best you have, and it may never be enough;
Give your best anyway.
In the final analysis, it is between you and God;
It was never between you and them anyway.

– Mother Teresa

I’m sure by now most of you have heard about the huge oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico and well, if you haven’t, just look it up. I’m sure you will find plenty of links to get caught up to speed. What you might not know though is that I live only 10 minutes from Destin, in northwest Florida, just over the Mid-Bay Bridge. 10 minutes from the gorgeous Emerald Coast beaches that I am truly sad to say, we have taken for granted in the last 5 years.

When I found out we were moving, I wasn’t all that traumatized by leaving here. Sure, I will miss watching the sun set over the bay while crossing the bridge, God’s creation at its finest but I “knew” we could always come back and visit. Take a vacation, splash in the waves and soak up the sun on the gorgeous white sand.

That was before the Deepwater Horizon exploded and the oil began gushing.

So far, our beaches have been spared. A few tar bars have been reported in Destin and on Okaloosa Island but nothing extreme. It is inevitable though. As much as I hate to say it, I do not think there is anyway our beaches will be spared forever. There is simply too much oil floating around out there and it has to go somewhere. Whether is be from currents or a hurricane, it won’t just magically go “poof” and be gone. It’s tragic really.

With that in mind, Jacey and I hit the beach for a “last look” when we were in Destin Saturday. There was a storm rolling in, so I didn’t get the pictures I had composed in my head but I took some anyway. Memories to always have and look back on. The beaches that I fell in love with as a young girl when I first had a vacation here for my uncle’s wedding to being blessed with living here for the last 5 years.

Never take anything for granted, because it can all be gone in an instant.

At least not yet :).

We will celebrate 11 years on July 31st, but Bryan and I decided to go ahead and do gifts (well, mine anyway…he doesn’t get his till our actual anniversary). This is way out of our norm, but this year we went big.

First up, Bryan got me a Shootsac with the Sprightly cover. Can I tell you how long I have had this bag on my wishlist…a long LONG time!

And of course, with that had to come the shoulder pad, since that is one of the few complaints about the bag.

As if that wasn’t enough, he also let me pick a new lens. I was torn between 3, a 28mm, 35mm and 85mm. Ultimately, I went with the 35mm. It has really good reviews and I am really getting away from taking pictures of people and more into taking pictures of “things”. I would love to get a foot in the door of some commercial photography/photojournalism, but we shall see. Perhaps I will pursue it once we get settled in Vegas…hmmm.

After all that though, I feel like Bryan’s gift just really doesn’t live up to mine. He is completely thrilled though. On our actual anniversary, I am taking him to see the Blue Man Group at the Venetian in Las Vegas. He has talked about going for years, so I figured if the Air Force was paying for our anniversary “trip” to Vegas, we might as well take advantage of it.

Of course, as luck would have it, after Bryan said to go ahead and order mine on Friday, I missed the cut off to have it shipped same day by a whole 15 minutes. Sigh. So here I sit, not so patiently awaiting Friday and the pretty blue and white boxes from my happy store, Adorama. If you hear shrieks of joy coming from my direction, now you know why!

(Disclaimer: This picture is not mine and I claim no credit for it.)

We go together like ramma lamma lamma ka dinga da dinga dong
Remembered forever as shoo-bop sha whada whadda yippidy boom da boom
Chang chang changity chang shoo bop that’s the way it should be
Waooo Yeah

Have I ever told you how much I <3 Grease?! I would rank it in my top 5 favorite movies. I mean, I even did the whole poodle skirt, 50′s girl thing for Halloween when I was a kid. Too bad I don’t have a picture of that scanned in or you would all get to experience Texas sized big hair Lacey (not sure what I was thinking…oh wait, I wasn’t…it was all my MOM :). Anyway, I digress.

I have also spread my love of Grease to Jacey, so when I saw that our local college was going to be doing a production of  it on stage, I knew I had to get tickets. So, I stayed up Sunday night to wait on them to go on sale and scored front row seats. I am thrilled and I know Jacey will be too. Mommy-Daughter date to Grease one week and Family date to Le Grand Cirque the next week.

Lucky girl :).

The biggest I think though lately is my self image and self expectations. I am mad at myself for gaining 10 pounds back from my lowest that I worked so hard to get to. I am mad at myself for not being able to get past 4 miles running when I was up to 6 regularly last year. I am frustrated at being tired all the time and letting the sugar addiction back in.

Today, I was listening to Sirius – The Message on the way to base and Johnny Diaz’s “More Beautiful You” came on. Can we say reality check?! I am adding more stress to my plate by being mad about all these things when I really need to step back and focus on the big picture.

For starters, I have went from this…

To this…

Even if I never get those 10 pounds BACK off, I have come a very LONG way.

And, as for the running, I just need to accept that I have cancer and while that may not cripple me, there will be days I can only make 1 mile and there may be days I can make 6. I need to enjoy it again, instead of beating myself up that I didn’t go far enough or fast enough. Who am I running for anyway? Myself or someone else?

This is not to say that I will never battle the “beating myself up” battle again. I think we all go through times like that for one reason or another, but we really need to try to step back and focus on what is truly important, the big picture!

Big mistake!

Houses there are CHEAP! Of course, because I have never looked at houses there before, I don’t know if they are truly low or just low compared to here, but whatever…I’ll take it. You can get a 3-4 bedroom, 2000+ square foot house, with a pool (a must for me) for well under $150,000.

Now, I don’t know what to do. Bryan and I spent an hour and a half tonight looking at houses online and talking it over. He’s all for buying now and I am the one holding back. The thought of buying a house is scary. The sad part is, is there is one online that I am already attached to and would love to see in person. Sigh.

I guess all we do at this point is pray about it and wait. We have a few bills that will be paid off this summer and I want those gone before we ever even think about applying for a home loan. The hard part though, is that if we do go into base housing, we HAVE to sign a 1 year lease. At least I think we have the area we’d “eventually” like to live in narrowed down. I suppose that’s a start :).

Decisions, decisions…